Pharmaceuticals Suck

Wait a minute…Yes, as a matter of fact I do feel tired when I wake up some mornings. And at times I do feel a little irritable when I haven’t eaten anything for several hours. Come to think of it, every once in a while I do have a little trouble falling asleep. What the hell is wrong with me?

Here I have been thinking that I am a reasonably happy, healthy person only suffering the symptoms of being human like a sick, pathetic, miserable idiot. Thank Heavens there is Paxlexa®™©, to help me become the person I thought I was before I saw this commercial, and which I now so clearly realize I am not. God bless you, Gunther, Simpson and Kruger. Besides, I can put up with a little anal seepage if it means finally looking so very completely satisfied with my life like that guy who takes Paxlexa®™© in your commercial.

I feel so lucky to live in America. Self-diagnosing and prescribing from the warm glow of your own television isn’t possible in most developed nations, as they have meaningful limitations to pharmaceutical advertising.


About P. Funkenstein

B. Wixwater is the Founder, Writer, Editor and Champion of the Portland Bugle.
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