98.3 The Spur Sucks

One of my local radio stations recently counted down the 20 greatest songs ever and TLC’s ‘Waterfalls’ didn’t even make the list. !.  Willie Nelson, Shania Twain and Garth Brooks made the list, but somehow the undisputed greatest act ever, singing a song that reaches into the deepest depths of the heart and soul didn’t.

I guess Big Country Dave and Rusty just don’t understand metaphors. See, TLC isn’t actually singing about waterfalls and rivers and lakes. Now, I’ll allow that it was several years before someone pointed this use of symbolism out to me, and it was a few more yet before I really grasped it, but I think it should be quite clear–even to a couple jockeys who are introduced to the sounds of a steer groaning–that these bodies of water actually stand to represent important life stuff. Waterfalls are really some stuff that people chase; and rivers and lakes are some other stuff.

But that’s all lost on 98.3 The Spur, where ‘Real Music for Real Folks’ doesn’t seem to include a real song about real stuff.

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About P. Funkenstein

B. Wixwater is the Founder, Writer, Editor and Champion of the Portland Bugle.
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